Before I wrap up the final part of my first year be sure to check out the previous parts linked below (if you haven’t already)!
So anyway like I was saying, it all started with a phone call from Aaron. He just came back from London and wanted to go out, but it was a Tuesday, and that JJ’s night wasn’t necessarily my cup of tea in my first year because the music wasn’t particularly to my liking, so I told him no and you would think that would have been the end of it, but no. An hour later “Can you come out,” “No.” Another hour later “Please come out,” “No.” Half an hour later “Please man, I haven’t been out in time,” “No.”
As you can guess this went on and on until I finally said yes because I had had enough lol. So I meet him there and we’re chilling, and after a while, I saw “her,” so I obviously went over to say hi, but she immediately took my hand and walked me outside.
The first thing she said was “I have something to tell you,” and you know when someone says that it’s never good. To cut a long speech short she basically said that she doesn’t think she’s ready for a relationship right now, but she’ll think about it, and let me now this coming Friday.
At first I was “alright kool,” but it wasn’t towards the end of the night I started to really feel it, and that Friday kept turning into the Friday after next, and that Friday after next, and that Friday after next, right up to the last day of university, but I’ll get into that a bit later.
From that moment she pulled me outside, everything after in my life just started going downhill, and I ended up failing my last module. But let me explain what happened because it’s actually a joke. So this wasteman that was teaching us said “He didn’t know what lab practical he was going to do our essay on,” which is a lie because ALL THE OTHER TEACHERS SAID WHICH ONE BEFOREHAND! But let me just continue. The rule was if you were late to a lab session you weren’t allowed to come in, and you’ll get capped at 40%, which is fine, I understand. The first lab session (which by my luck happened to be the one the essay was on) I was not feeling well, and I ended up getting there 13 minutes late. THIS GUY HAS SEEN MY FACE! I explained to him the situation and he even said “Yeah you don’t look too good, go home,” “But you’re also going to get capped at 40%”
Alright kool, fair enough. So I did the essay, and my exams for that module, get my results back, and I get a zero.
A zero…A ZERO!
I don’t think you understand, A ZERO!!! You would at least get 5% for writing the title or something, so how the fuck could he have given me a ZERO! Outraged by this abomination, I went to confront him about it, and his exact words were “You weren’t here for the lab, so you got a zero.”
The same guy who saw my face that day, the same guy who told me to go home “I don’t look too good,” THE SAME GUY WHO SAID “I WILL BE CAPPED AT 40%,” TO MY FACE. Had the audacity, THE AUDACITY… (let me not even continue because even to this day it gets me mad, and I will honestly start cussing) But I had another resit for the year, and another 99 problems on my mind.
Switching it back to “her,” like I said every Friday became the next one, and the thing that made it worse is that I would see her out on these Fridays when she said she would message me, but it would just be the same thing.
There was one particular night when I was chilling with her and Rachel, and they were about to leave. I said bye to Rachel and her, but then I wanted to say something (which I don’t remember), but Rachel pulled her away to go. Not intentionally like “Fuck that guy doesn’t talk to him,” she was just going isn’t it lol. But for some reason, I just felt an overwhelming sadness come over me, and for the rest of the night, I was just trying to keep myself together.
(I look horrible in group pictures, but this was the actual night. Don’t ask me about what’s going on in the far right either because I don’t know myself lool).
So the night finishes and I’m walking out, and for some reason, I can feel myself about to cry. Now I’m not going to lie I used to be a cry baby right up to the middle of year 8 where I just forced myself to stop (you can probably find why centered around this post: (Do You Really Know Me?), but I don’t want to get into that).
So I get outside now, and I can just feel it coming. I remember my friend seeing me shouting “Yoooo, what’s up Osi.” I quickly just dapped his hand and continued walking because I didn’t want him to see me crying, but for some reason, I walked straight up to my other friend and cried in front of her instead (the girl in the blue top ruining that ruined the red train first lol).
I ended up sleeping at hers and then we spoke about what was going on in the morning (which I initially was reluctant to say), she gave her take on everything until I ended up going home to 12 on the day.
But when I got home I was not feeling right. My mum was on my case (and you know how “understanding” African parents are), there was this resit, “her,” and it just felt like everything was falling apart, and I ended up going into a mad depressive state. For that whole week, I did not eat or do anything at all. The only time I would get up was to go toilet, but apart from that, I was in bed all day. It wasn’t until Saturday I had my first bit of food (which was only a bowl of noodles). Then on Sunday, I was like “Nah, this can’t end like this, so I was determined to sort this out once and for all.”
Done my resits, last night out, see her in the club and now it’s my turn to take her outside and say “We need to talk.” Just on a quick note, they actually didn’t let me in initially because they said I was too drunk (but they let my friend in when he was way worse than me), but I managed to get them to allow me in after speaking to the manager and working something out. But anyway, my friend who I went over to crying saw me talking to her and came over to talk to her privately. After they had their little talk, she came back over saying “We just need to talk more,” and “We’ll do this in the summer,” and etc. So kool. We went back in, enjoyed ourselves, dropped her home, and that was that.
(Actual picture of that night, also fuck the camera man because this was a mad slip lol)
That was really that because I started to get left on read…
But that’s a story for chapter two of my uni adventure.