My Parents (Audio Blog)

Hey everyone,

I’m a bit low on “mood” (which you will hear), but I’ll let the audio to the talking.

Link to original post: My Parents

12 Comments Add yours

  1. Erik says:

    First, I listened to the entire 9:47. I wanted you to know that, based on your final comment in the audio track.

    I have a dozen thoughts, and yet what you talked about is so personal, it somehow doesn’t feel right to say it all here in this open forum. What I will say here, however, is that you are doing something many people would not: being honest about the way things are. So often in today’s online world, people present only the happy-beautiful-perfect version of themselves. Then they turn off the social and suffer in silence, knowing that even their online “friends” only “like” them because of that veneer they put up.

    As for personal progress, keep in mind that you don’t always see it right away. For instance, you’ve clearly put a ton of work into this blog! How many people start a blog or other undertaking and then quit after a week or a month when they aren’t famous. It’s hard to write or record content with no indication that people are reading or listening. But you’re doing it. And that takes a level of discipline and commitment that are building inside of you. Like you said about relationships with your parents, you can’t expect to have nothing for a long period of time and then have it suddenly be something, right? That’s true. And the same goes for personal achievement. You continue to do something with your writing and expression, and so you are building the platform, tools and discipline to turn into something more. You’re making yourself ready with each post for whatever is next for you.

    As for your parents, I’ll ask two simple questions (really, one question in two parts). Why did you choose this image to represent them, when it does not seem to match your track? What do you feel when you look at this image?

    Liked by 2 people

    1. officialosi says:

      My blog name ‘OUKASnation’ is really OUTCASTnation (just spelt with a k), but without the t’s. I’ve always felt like/been an Outcast (which I explained in different post), but I took out the t’s because when you take them out of “won’t” and “can’t” it’s something positive, so it’s just a thing where something good can come out of being an outcast.

      With that being said I feel you become more self aware always being on the outside looking in, so I’ve never really had a problem being honest about my situations because I’ve always had a different view on things.

      You’re defo right with the time aspect of things, and to answer your last question (or questions).

      1. Those are the only type of pictures with my parents together

      2. I don’t really know what love is because I haven’t actually seen or experienced it (apart from movies, and I know it’s not like that), so looking at that is probably the closest thing to feel/ or relate to it (since it’s from my parents), but yet, it still feels far away (hopefully that answers the question)

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Erik says:

    I think it’s awesome that you’ve even included something in your online name that reminds you that you CAN.

    Follow-up question: how old do you suppose your parents were in this picture? (I have a point, I promise.)

    Liked by 1 person

    1. officialosi says:

      Probably early 20’s. No older than 23

      Liked by 1 person

      1. Erik says:

        Interesting that you added “no older than 23,” which if I recall correctly from the audio reel, is your current age. I don’t think that was an accident. Does it give you some perspective to know that they were perhaps younger than you are now when this picture was taken? I see joy and fun and love in their eyes and faces. A lot of life can happen in another 20 years. Sounds like they got dragged down, gave in to some degree. Maybe they were even feeling some of what you are feeling now—caught in that space where life feels overwhelming and they aren’t ever going to be who they thought they’d be.

        No excuses here. But perhaps it allows some explanation—and some empathy.

        So now it’s your turn, your time. What you decide today and tomorrow will be who you become, who you are in 20 years. What will your kids or nieces and nephews, or neighborhood kids, think of you then? What stories will they tell? How will you turn up in their blogs of the future?

        Take a snapshot of yourself today. And then envision that the very same picture will be “old” in 20 years. Your now-eyes will be looking at you out of that photo. What story will it tell? What will future-you think of it?

        Again, I’ll say, this is your time. Live it fully. Don’t give in and don’t give up. Make future-you proud.

        Liked by 2 people

      2. officialosi says:

        I’ve gotten two different sides from them, and I don’t like being in the middle of conflict (especially this), so I try to stay out of it and neutral.

        I had to read the second to last paragraph twice to understand it lol, but I’m already on that journey since this new year, and in 20 years time we shall see where I’m at

        Liked by 1 person

  3. Erik says:

    BTW, it’s not just an “African thing” that mothers call their kids from far away and then tell you something trivial when you get there. It’s a mother thing. My mother still does it at 75! Their generation was raised that way (still close to the “children should be seen and not heard” era, when children were seen more as pupils and workers than as… well, children). I’ve found that using humor has changed this tendency in my own mom, as well as just talking to her about things like that in a low-pressure way and listening to her viewpoint. (In fact, that’s how I learned it’s the way she was raised.) Now, if my mother forgets when I’m over and yells to me from upstairs, I yell even louder back (comically so), something like, “How about we meet halfway and stop screaming?” We laugh. And she gets the point now.

    Liked by 2 people

    1. officialosi says:

      And also, I have 10 more pages left before I finish, but I’m so tired right now that I shall continue tomorrow

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Erik says:

    Where are you in the world (location)? UK?

    Liked by 1 person

    1. officialosi says:

      You were right with the UK

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Sophia Ismaa says:

    That’s a really difficult situation to go through. I’ve been in your place, I know and remember exactly how you’ve been feeling. Weirdly, for me, I think it just got better when I thought “screw it”, I’m not going to wait around for someone to love me, I’m going to do it myself… and somehow my relationship with my mum is really good now. I don’t know how it’ll be for you, but you will get through it. You’re lightening your burden by speaking about it on your blog which is amazing because it means you’re not isolating yourself and that helps a lot, and you’re not afraid to speak up about how you feel and as Erik rightly said, you have a lot of discipline. I hope you remember that.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. officialosi says:

      Thank you so much for your words. Obviously it’s gonna be a LONG process, but we’re hopeful of getting there 💪🏽🙏🏽

      Like

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